Tragedy
by MyAngelMariska
Summary: September 11, 2001 changed the lives of so many in a matter of hours and shook our nation to it's core. Never Forget. Never Again. (One Shot, Olivia Benson's Story)


**This is something that I owe a huge thank you to Chana (somedayactress) for, she came up with the idea, and the voice mail, and then this story came into my head, and it had to be written ASAP. This is in memory of all those whose lives were lost on 9/11/01 in the attacks in NY, DC, and PA. Never Forget, Never Again.**

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><p>"<em>I don't think I'm going to make it out of here alive. If I don't, I want you to know, you were the best friend a girl could ask for. Tell Mitchell and the boys I love them so much and I love yo—" <em>The line went dead, just as it had every time she listened to the voicemail in the last thirteen years. It never got easier, and she realized the prospect of losing one of her best friends to such a senseless act of violence never would get easier.

September 11 was a day that changed not only her life, but the lives of so many others. Every New Yorker was affected by the events that took place on that day. She remembered every detail as if it had happened only yesterday, a morning that started out so normal, turned into a day that shook her and so many others to their core. The sounds were what played in her mind most often. And every year, on the anniversary, whenever she closed her eyes she saw the destruction behind her eyes.

She heard the screams, she felt the rumble as the planes made impact, and then as the towers fell. She saw innocent men and women jumping to their deaths, figuring that would be better than the alternative of being suffocated by smoke, or crushed by the debris.

As Olivia sat at her desk, in her office, that day looking at her coffee, feeling her stomach in knots she couldn't help but thing, and feel her heart break a little more. She remembered back to that morning, remembering how even though they had no information, and didn't know much of what was going on, she ran out of the precinct, to Ground Zero, rushing into the worst of the destruction, pulling people from the rubble, both alive and dead. Those who were walking away as she was running towards the wreckage looked like zombies, covered in dust. Many were dazed, in a state of shock. Some were crying and screaming, and as she looked up she saw people falling from windows and wanted to open her arms and be able to catch all of them.

_The squad felt the rumble in the floor. They fell to the floor, covering their heads, but when nothing more happened they all stood up and looked around, and that's when they heard yelling. "Turn on the TV! A plane just flew into the Twin Towers!" a uniformed officer called. _

_The TV was turned on and Olivia looked on in horror. As they all sat watching, they saw the second plane make impact, feeling the rumble in the floor again. Olivia shook her head. "No," she couldn't look away from the screen as the news reported on what was happening. Everyone was absolutely devastated, confused, and in shock. As the towers fell Olivia felt as if her breath was hit out of her. She ran out of the precinct towards Ground Zero. _

_As people passed she noticed the dazed expression on their faces. As she got to the site of the attacks, she showed her badge and was given access to do what she could to help. She covered her mouth and nose with her sleeve and held her breath when she needed both hands. She pulled bodies out of the rubble, feeling for a pulse. Some were still alive, some of them weren't. She called for Paramedics for the injured, and moved those who had perished to somewhere where the coroners could find them as they arrived. She found pictures, letters, business cards, and pieces of jewelry. _

_She stayed for hours, until it was getting too difficult to breathe from the soot. It broke her heart to leave the scene, but she knew that if she collapsed, it would only mean more work for the first responders. She walked away, her head hanging, and her heart aching. This was senseless, how could anyone do something like this? Why? She went home that night and showered. She sat in her tub with the shower beating on her, hugging her knees and crying. She coughed for most of the night, she stayed up crying. Nothing made sense._

_The next morning, she woke up from a broken sleep and looked at her phone, seeing the notification of a voicemail that had gone unchecked the day before. She looked at the call she missed and she gasped, Cat, one of her best friends who worked in Tower 2. She listened to the voicemail and she sobbed as Cat's voice filtered through her ears. "I don't think I'm going to make it out of here alive. If I don't, I want you to know, you were the best friend a girl could ask for. Tell Mitchell and the boys I love them so much and I love yo—" _

_She wanted to make plans to have a girls night out that night, and then she saw the plane heading towards her. No, this couldn't be. Cat couldn't be gone, that's why she was called Cat. She always landed on her feet, no matter what hardship was thrown her way. She called Cat's husband and heard his panicked voice. "Olivia? Are you alright? Have you—"_

"_Mitch," she cut him off, her voice wavering. _

"_No. No no no. Please," he broke._

_Olivia started to cry. "I'm so sorry. She called me yesterday, and I didn't see my phone, I didn't even see the message until just now. Mitch," she took a deep breath. "She wanted you and the boys to know that she loves you. Loved," she sobbed and wiped her eyes. "I don't understand Mitch."_

"_Oh, Liv."_

"_The plane hit before she could finish the message, God, I don't understand, why would someone do this?"_

Telling Mitch that his wife had died, had seen the plane coming towards her, and knew she was about to die was one of the hardest things that she'd ever done. This day was always hard for her, but she was particularly on edge today. She walked out of her office and saw everyone looking at their computers. "Any leads?" she snapped.

"Um, we're waiting on the fingerprints," Amanda said, slightly timid.

"So, everyone is just sitting around on their asses, great to know," she spat and grabbed her coat, walking outside and standing, looking up at the Freedom Tower. She choked back a sob and she walked back upstairs to the squad rom, composing herself on the way up. "Guys, I have something I need to do. I'm not sure how long I'll be. Call if you need anything." She turned and walked out, heading to Ground Zero. She found Cat's name on the reflection pool and she touched it, tears running down her face. "Im sorry," she whispered.

She stayed at the pools for a while, just sitting and looking at the names and the water. After a while she took a cab back to the apartment she shared with Brian and she changed into sweats and an old T-shirt, and curled up on the couch, tears beginning to stream down her face again. Brian walked in from work a couple hours later to see Olivia staring off into space, a sob occasionally wracking her body. His heart broke.

Brian took his coat and shoes off and walked over to the couch and wrapped her in his arms. She buried her head in his chest and she sobbed. He stroked her hair and rubbed her back soothingly. "It's going to be okay, Liv. It'll all be okay," he whispered. He knew a little about how the events of September 11, 2001 affected her, but he didn't know the whole story, but he wouldn't push. He knew better than that. So, rather than beg her to tell him, he just held her as she cried and did his best to soothe her. She wound up falling asleep in his arms and he picked her up and carried her to bed. He lay her down and quickly changed into pajama pants and got into bed next to her, holding her tight, kissing her temple.

"Good night, my hero," he whispered to her, settling next to her and closing his eyes, falling asleep with Olivia wrapped securely in his arms.

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><p><strong>AN: Thank you for reading, please leave a review. I'm not a hundred percent on the accuracy of the efforts of the clean up, and I mean no disrespect for any inaccuracy. I just did my best. This isn't nearly as long as most of my stories, but I don't think it needs to be long. Like I said, please review, here or on Twitter (myangelMariska)**


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